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Mixed marriages no longer taboo
KATHMANDU, JAN 17 - ‘Jogendra Keshari Ghimire weds Kavita Sherchan’. This might not be news for some, but many may find it strange- a Brahmin groom getting married with a Thakali bride and with consent of both parents. Though few in number, such cases are increasing in our society, especially in the valley.
Jogendra and Kavita, both with promising careers ahead, married yesterday among family members from both sides. Was there any resistance from the parents? "Not exactly," said Jogendra. "There was a bit of apprehension for a few days since it had never happened in the family. But they respected our decision because we are mature enough to take decisions on our own," he added. The newly wed also enjoyed the consent from their grandparents who proved to be liberal and supportive.
With women in the valley crossing the threshold and opting for a career rather than bowing to their parent’s decision to marry them off, the cases of inter-caste marriage is surely on the rise.
Sociologists take this move as a positive one. "The trend is indeed very positive," says Krishna Bahadur Bhattachan, a sociologist. "Women are coming out of their houses, which means they are exposed to men and the intimacy is bound to flourish," he adds.
Inter-caste marriage is however, not a new phenomenon. It has been part of our society for generations. The only difference is that now is more readily accepted by society.
In the past, inter-cast marriages happened but were rare. The marriage of Chhaya KC and Rajendra Man Singh is a case in point. They were married off 10 years ago on their parents’ consent, and are living a happy married life. "It was quite a shock for us since we had no idea that our parents would oblige us without any resistance," they say. "The society then was not as liberal as it is now."
They were from totally different backgrounds. One with a Newar upbringing and one a Chhetri, marriage for them was in a sense a compromise. Their culture differed, in addition to the language and surely the lifestyle. "But I came to find out all it takes for a happy married life is mutual understanding," says Rajendra, 37, a bank officer.
Chhaya, 30, says, "His family was very supportive and helped me out with my ordeal of adjusting to a different culture."Posted on: 2004-01-18 02:29
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