E-Kantipur

APR 03 - ‘Oh, earth, you are too wonderful for anybody to realise you. Do any human beings ever realise life while they live it—every, every minute?” says the main character Emily in Thornton Wilder’s classic American play Our Town. She speaks to the important force of the earth and the way many of us take it for granted, looking back after her life has reached its inevitable conclusion.

I spent much of my twenties wondering when my life would go according to my well-imagined plan, and how I would get there. I never fully realised life while I lived it; I just moved along at the speed of a freight train. Admittedly, I was given more to wondering what was going wrong instead of what was going right. I never looked at the sunset and smiled; I was too busy jumping on the subway from work, or preparing graduate school applications, or trying to figure out what I was going to do with the rest of my life. I wasn’t grateful for what I had in my life at the time. I wanted what I couldn’t have, not realising what I already had.  

We focus more on what we don’t have, what we need more of, why money is tight, or why our lives are so difficult. We live ungratefully instead of gratefully. Instead of ‘realising life’ as Emily wishes she would have in Our Town, we live too quickly and too violently, with our heads down. Living here in Nepal I have seen how I took for granted so many things in the U.S.: 24 hours electricity every day; drinking water out of the faucet; ovens in every home; supermarkets with a plethora of food choices; central heating; and all the books I could ever read.

Gratitude is defined as a state of thankfulness: the state being something we can choose to be in. My life here is much simpler, and maybe because of that, I am in a state of gratitude. 

Our Town, a classic 1938 play, provides many life lessons, including being thankful for our lives. Wilder wants us to be grateful for every moment, as we don’t know how many moments we have on this earth. These essential truths all work together: living life to the fullest, having gratitude for simple things, not spending undue time on things that do not matter in the long run. Being thankful for things that everyone bypasses is an important thing, something that is seemingly lost in our new technologically fuelled age. My cousin Abbey said, while discussing Our Town, “You think of how progressive people feel they need to be, but it is truly simple things that make life worth living.” We need to turn off the computers and be thankful for the sound of the birds. There is always a simple thing that can transport us to a state of gratitude amid the quick pace of our contemporary lifestyles.

Being grateful for something every single day is something I learned while working at a men’s prison. I worked with a small group of men writing plays from their imagination and life experiences. After my first night in class, one of the men responded with ‘get home safe’ and instinctually I replied, ‘you too.’ Realising the error of my statement, I felt embarrassed and attempted an apology but the man only responded with ‘We will one day’. In the confines of Sing Sing Correctional Facility in New York, I realised that I had an incredible amount to be grateful for, things that I would have taken for granted before. These inmates are told when to shower, when to eat, and when they can leave. I was able to go home that evening, thankful for my freedom.

When one’s freedom is compromised, then all else seems inconsequential. Despite that, the men in my class would thank me for giving my time to them, appreciating even the smaller gestures with gratitude. Their gratitude could be expressed as a way for them to feel alive, a way of combating the deadening atmosphere of prison. As Thornton Wilder says, “We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.”

(Lilly blogs at http://creativityforpersonalgrowth.yolasite.com)

     hannahglilly@gmail.com

Posted on: 2010-04-03 09:43

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